America’s Got Talent?

Today, while enjoying a cup of Greek yogurt and a Clif bar for breakfast during my mid-morning lunch break, for no reason other than because it was there, I began flipping through the pages of an Entertainment Weekly Magazine. Toward the end of this periodical in which I haven’t laid eyes on for a very long time and now I know why, I found the listing for the Top 25 Television Shows in America. As my eyes scroll down the list I was shocked.

The next thing I did was grabbed a pen and made marks beside each of the shows. I had two sets of marks, one was for shows that were reality or talent based and the other mark was for shows that actually had real writing. I began to laugh as I looked at the title of the article as it read, ‘America’s Got Talent’. Not only was that the main title, it was the number one show on television for the week.

Out of the top twenty five shows, fifteen of them were reality/talent based and only ten were shows produced from actual thought and writing. That means sixty percent of the most watched shows are shows in which we as people are watching other people do random whatever that has been recorded by a video camera. America likes to be entertained. Dance for us monkey! Oh wait, dance for us you once very popular for some reason kind of monkey!

But that is the Soap Box for a street corner of another day. Today’s box that I am climbing on is about ‘talent’. If America really had some, wouldn’t we be creating new ideas all the time? Meaning, instead of just vomiting up a no nothing dance-a-thon or, dare I say it, American Idol #27, why can’t we make something of value? Give me something that I can grab onto. Give me something that has a story. I don’t care if the story is lame. I would rather have a show with a lame story than Bobo, the dancing celebrity.

Decisions, Decisions

We face decisions every day. Most of them are so infinitely tiny we don’t recognize them. Whether it is which pair of underwear to put your legs through and slide up over your booty. Or it could be what will be your first meal of the day to what you will listen to on your way to work. Each and every day is filled with little steps that take a small decision in order to keep going.

Other decisions are quite larger, tougher and sometimes more scary to confront. Why are they this way? They are tougher because the results are more rewarding. These decisions actually receive our attention and a lot of it. I have found the more thought and attention given to a matter, the better the outcome and sweeter the reward. This is something that shouldn’t be taken lightly. In a way I feel if we respect this particular decision, it will respect and bless us back.

When you are faced with a choice between two answers, you are operating on faith. Sometimes there are no reference points for what we need to accomplish because this is uncharted waters. So, the best we can do is line up the facts on either side and do the math. Ultimately we have to go with what feels right in our heart. Outside circumstances shouldn’t affect our thinking process.

The way I usually go about it is, I ask myself, ‘which way will help me grow as a person and what will make me happier?’ We deserve the best out of life. Personally, I am in the process of a major decision in my life. I am approaching it with the above question. At first, I thought about finances, my career, my friends and where my life is today. Although those are of great concern, I have to be able to go with which side of the coin that answers ‘Yes’.

Strangers=Friends

While working at my retail job yesterday I encountered a middle aged woman who had four young children with her. As I was helping another customer in line in front of her, the children were as energetic as most are. Also, they were not paying attention to their surroundings, go figure. I heard the mother say, ‘Hey guys, let’s wait until the man is done helping our friend first’. I kept doing what I normally do at the register and scanned products like a good little worker bee.

Once I was finished with the customer who was there, she walked up with her kids. As I scanned her items, she was juggling her children and bagging groceries at the same time. She literally had her hands full, while behind her one of the kids almost bumped into another person in another line. The mom politely turned to the child again and says, ‘Be careful and watch out for our friends around us’. That’s when it hit me. She kept calling perfect strangers, ‘Friends’. At first I thought it was possible that she could have been friends with the woman in front of her, but I doubted that she could be friends with all of those people.

I see a lot of mothers who come in with several kids all the time. Usually they are stressed and in a hurry. Sometimes they are rude and will grab their child by the arm to pull them out of the way in those circumstances. This is the reason why she stood out. She glowed with positivity. It was so refreshing. I was really tired, at the end of a long couple of days and ready for a nap. This woman perked me right up and made my day.

Upon hearing this mom use this positive way of correcting her children the second time, I immediately stopped everything and commended her. She was a little caught off guard because I stopped scanning her items just to compliment her. After she thanked me she went on to explain that she heard this at the daycare where she takes her children. I fired back with, ‘That’s wonderful, keep taking your children there, that is a great daycare’.

In this world where we see a lot of negative and wrong things happen every day, it really comforts me to know there are some people out there who are still doing things right.

A new thing I am choosing to do is being friendlier. Now, I already consider myself a friendly person, but I’m going to stretch myself even a little more and talk to strangers more often, especially if I am in an awkward tight space like an elevator or something to that effect. You never know what might happen because of it.

The other day I was flying back to Charlotte, NC from California. Normally, I would probably not talk to the lovely lady who sat next to me. Sure, I would have been polite but this time I started off with a little humor to break the ice. Eventually I shared some cookies with her. By the end of the flight we exchanged numbers and planned on meeting for a drink sometime. I started out talking to a perfect stranger and ended with a new friend.

I Will Love You Always (In Honor of My Mother)

The following is what I read at my mother's memorial service on August 9, 2012.

I Will Love You Always

Those were the last words I heard from my mother over my cell phone while I was in Charlotte, NC last Wednesday. We always ended our conversations with, ‘I love you’. This time was different and I knew it.

At first I was in shock and shortly after I got off the phone the tears came. While crying I kept saying to myself, ‘She said she was ready to go’. After a few times of a uttering those words an overwhelming peace filled the room. By the time I received the final call from my brother Danny about her passing, I was happy. I was happy because she is no longer in pain. She is no longer suffering. She is in complete rest and at peace.

Now is the time to celebrate the great life she had. So, from here on out let’s focus on the wonderful memories I know we all have shared with her.

Throughout the years of growing up you take for granted all the wonderful things Mom does for you. Sometimes we don’t realize them until it’s too late. So, I encourage you to appreciate the Mom you have and make her aware of that constantly because we owe them our lives.

For me my mother was my:

Personal Physician: When I was just a little guy, if I had a boo-boo or owwie, who do you think I ran to while screaming in pain? Mom, she always knew what to do. It was like she had a PhD in medicine. Usually her go to cure was only a band-aide and a kiss to make it all feel better. Those kisses were magical weren’t they? It didn’t matter how severe the boo-boo, after that kiss, I was back out playing like nothing happened.

Teacher: As I grew with age and my level of mischief she became my teacher. Her favorite tool was a big wooden spoon. When I was smaller it would sting and I would stop doing whatever I was doing wrong. But when I became bigger, let’s just say I could have probably built a log cabin with all those broken spoons.

Say what you will about how parents discipline children. Back then I hated those wooden spoons. But now I appreciate them because through those spoons my mother taught me the difference between right and wrong. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Personal Five Star Chef: are you kidding? I didn’t get this size because of any other reason. Everything mom cooked was delicious, even if it wasn’t our favorite dish, it still was the best. She would always make my favorite for my birthday, usually chicken enchiladas, for those who are keeping score.

Cheerleader: Every baseball game I played, she was there cheering me on. I know because you could hear her yell over all the other parents in the stands. Or she would ring her cow bell, just to kick it up a notch. I loved that about her.

Last but not Least…

Counselor: Later on in life, even after I grew up, got married, moved away and then divorced, I still needed my Mommy. Especially when times were really hard, she was a phone call away. She always knew what to say to calm me down.

What do all of these things have in common? They all are grounded in Love. Sometimes it doesn’t have to be said. But if you really pay attention to the real meaning of her actions you will know in your heart, she loves you.

My mom had a fun life. She loved her family, her friends and neighbors. Most of all she loved life.

It’s amazing to see how much she is reflected in my life today. I could go on and on and brag about how wonderful I turned out, but the point is she helped mold me into who I am today. A lot of my personal traits came from my mother. Even down to my passion and career. It hit me just a few days ago. We were going through piles and piles of pictures to choose which ones we wanted to share with everyone. I realized mom loved to take pictures. For those of you who don’t know, that’s what I do for a living. Coincidence, I think not.

For all of those things and many more of which I haven’t the space to list, I will love you always.